Angel
by Sahariah
Summary: Snickers ficlet! Takes place during 'Grave Danger' Spoiler warning! Sara vows to tell Nick what she should have five years ago... should she ever be given the opportunity to see him again... alive. Prequel to 'The Rest of Our Lives', please R&R!


_Disclaimer:_ I don't own CSI or it's awesome characters… (cries) I do, however… love the show and Snickers fanfics!

_Spoilers:_ The plot from the Season 5 Finale. (It's based on Grave Danger… an episode which I do not own…)

_A/N:_ This story was originally based on a song, but I found out you weren't allowed to include song lyrics on anymore. If you would like to read the songfic version, it's here for your viewing : I don't want to break any rules here… so this version doesn't have the lyrics in it.

I think that the whole Sara/ Nick relationship has been so downplayed on the show lately, especially in the finale (Grave Danger). Sara was hardly in it, and she didn't even jump into the ambulance after they found Nicky. It was most disappointing... Anyway, I figured their connection could take place a little later... especially after Grissom's comment to Ecklie (I want my guys back). I could have hugged him until he stopped breathing... Finally some hope of the team getting back together... Anyway, my muse got going, and along came this little one-shot ficlet. Snickers pairing- but nothing serious. (grin) yet. There may be a sequel or two... let me know what you think!

On with the show!

* * *

**_-----Angel-----

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_**

"Nicky… where are you…" Sara whispered into the soft throw that lay on her bed. Her face was buried into the fluffy cover that hugged her cheeks, providing some elusive comfort to her plight. Tears soaked the fabric as she knelt at the bedside; her grief had overwhelmed her before she made it on. Fingers twirled in the cover, she felt nothing but pain and regret… thought of nothing but her stubborn reluctance to put into words for him what she'd known for a long time. The possibilities of a second chance rushed seemingly unattainable before her closed eyes, and she felt sick to her stomach. What had kept her from telling him for five years?

Sara hoped beyond hope that she'd see Nick alive again. Her heart ached terribly as sobs wracked her body… She missed everything about him- the smell of his aftershave, his Texan charm, his mannerisms; the way his forehead crinkled up when he shone with that dazzling smile. The knowing glances they used to exchange…

The fleeting memories of a time that seemed so long ago poured salt into the wounds of her entire being. The pain was numbing… and she yearned for his touch; the one that caused her feeble heart to skip a beat every time, without fail. Her hands, formed into small fists, tugged tightly at the poor blanket in an attempt to somehow drain the emotionally induced agony from her body. She needed him, and the selfishness of her wishes tore at her; she had no business pitying herself when he was stuck in a goddamn box somewhere.

Sara bit her lip as she finally forced herself up from her knees. She could do nothing more than her job. This… crying… was not fair to him. She just had to keep looking. 'I'm going to find you. You'll be alright… and I'll be there.'

She didn't care what shit Grissom had to spew at her when she got back to the lab. He'd told her to go home and get some rest; she had been pulling a triple. No lassitude flowed through her veins; only the constant adrenaline of hope and determination. He could stuff his advice up his ass, she was going to find Nicky. There was no way she could sleep in the lonely room of her home without knowing beyond doubt that her distant friend was alright.

Slowly, her sniffling stopped. She ran quickly into her bathroom to wash her face before picking up her keys from the kitchen counter, finally heading out the door and shutting it closed with a determined slam.

Before she knew it, Sara was facing the glass doors of the LVMPD Crime Lab with sunglass covered eyes once more. She threw the right door open and marched straight into the tracing room. Catherine, Grissom, Greg and Warrick stared at a map of the Greater Las Vegas area, trying to figure out just where Nick was buried.

"Sara; what are you doing here?" Grissom looked up from the map to the face of his female coworker.

"I'm here to find Nick. What are you doing here?" Sara answered, lips pursed in resolve. Grissom sighed, rubbing the back of his head with a free hand.

"Alright." He gave up. "Here's what we know."

* * *

"Get the Paramedics!" Sara yelled, watching Warrick talking to Nick through the glass and Greg killing the ants with a fire extinguisher. Her heart beat uncontrollably fast and she felt sick to her stomach; but she was certain Nick was feeling much worse. But he was alive… and she was infinitely grateful. They were getting him out… when…

"Everyone! Clear the hole! There are charges under the box!" Catherine ran over, carrying her cell phone in her hand.

* * *

"Nicky… Poncho… Promise me…" Grissom kneeled on his coffin, hands visible through the glass. His words calmed Nick… and he nodded. Poncho… He would be alright, he'd soon be free of this glass box… He'd see his parents, hug his sisters… Make his supervisor proud, win a bet with Warrick, Leggo his Greggo… Live to see Sara crack another one of those adorable gap tooth grins. 

"You have to stay lying down... There are explosives underneath the glass. It'll be alright, Poncho." Grissom assured him, finally getting up. Nick nodded again, shaking. He tried to calm himself, but his nerves and emotions were in hysterics. Just a little longer… was all he could think as more sweaty tears fell down the sides of his face.

* * *

They took turns visiting Nicky later that week at the hospital. He was still in pretty bad shape, but the huge welts on his forearms were slowly going down and the uncontrollable shaking was ceasing. Catherine exited his room with a sad smile, warm tears falling down the contours of her cheeks. She walked up to Sara who stood quietly in the hallway, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. 

"Nicky's asking for you." Her voice was unusually kind; at least in its address to Sara. The two strong headed woman of CSI had been on less than friendly terms in the past, but somehow both had managed to push all of the nonsense into the past for Nick's sake. Tears welled now in Sara's eyes as she bit her lip with her arms crossed defiantly, avoiding her female coworker's eye. "C'mon Sara." Catherine pulled the younger woman into a motherly hug, rubbing her back in an effort to provide some comfort. Sara stood rigid against the wall for a moment but then gave in and rested her head on Catherine's shoulder, sobbing quietly.

"Go see him." Catherine insisted still kindly, holding Sara's arms as she pulled away. Sara looked her in the eye and finally managed a nod, sniffing and wiping her tears away before taking a deep breath and putting on her best gap tooth grin.

* * *

Nick looked up from his pillow as he watched Sara enter the room. He looked so fragile, she was afraid he'd shatter if she touched him. The dazzling smile that he gave her as she walked toward him was contrary to his delicate look, it was clear that he was quite pleased to see her. She returned the grin with equal fervor, exposing the trademark gap-tooth.

"I was looking forward to seeing that gap tooth grin of yours." Nick managed to say; his throat a little scratchy. He cleared it and continued. "Hey Sar." Sara felt tears welling up in her eyes once more as she noted the way his forehead crinkled up as he smiled. Their eyes locked like they had so many times before, and she couldn't help but shed the tears as she remembered kneeling at her own bedside, mourning the loss of the friend she had come to love. He was safe… and that Texas charm was certainly still intact.

"Oh, Nicky…" Sara, unable to contain herself any longer, rushed to his bedside. She clasped his hand between her own, squeezing it between warm and loving palms. Nick turned to lay on his side to face her, pulling her into a tight embrace. She felt his warm tears fall onto her face and down her neck as he rubbed his cheek against hers.

"For some time… I really believed I'd never see you again." He told her as she rubbed his back with a hand, still clasping one of his in her other.

"I dreaded the same thing…" Sara whispered softly into his ear, finally standing up only to sit on his bed and pull him closer into a proper embrace.

"The thing I think I feared most… was not being able to tell you… or more apologize…" Sara began awkwardly, pausing to figure out how to word what she was about to say. She had promised she'd express what she'd kept hidden beneath a tough and vaguely emotionless exterior for the last five years… given a second chance. Nick looked a little confused as the two sat together cross legged on the bed. Not knowing where to direct her gaze, Sara looked down at her socked feet; she had taken her shoes off seconds ago. He noticed her awkwardness and squeezed her hand a little.

"Apologize? What for? You were the one that found me, so I'm told!" Sara looked up at this, smiling a little at his thankful face. The look of a happy puppy was returning to his dark eyes, and she felt herself become lost in them as she had so many times before… until Nick pulled her into another hug as if to comfort and prompt her to continue. Sara returned the gesture, her arms tangling tightly around him. Her head rested gently on his shoulder, and she whispered into his ear.

"I wanted to apologize for not keeping our friendship alive after we spilt shifts… I was… really selfish… and I just kept on lying and lying to myself…" Nick listened to her words intently, finally pulling away to catch her eye once more.

"I'm just as guilty of that as you are."

"I… think I've been in denial for a long time… and I'm disgusted with myself that it took your kidnapping for me to be willing to admit it…" Sara continued, her palm resting on his shoulder. He followed her eyes with his own intently, beginning to understand what she might be talking about. He smiled at the apparent guilt in her eyes, and wished he could make it go away. He hated to see her look to be in so much pain.

"It's been so easy to just hide it and carry on… but it became harder when I saw less and less of you because of the shift change…" Sara beat around the bush a little more, letting her hand run down his arm. Nick averted his gaze to the hand, which he picked up in his own.

"Sara…" He chuckled, smiling at her. She looked up from the bed sheets that she had been tracing circles upon with a finger and grinned shyly back, a rosy blush crossing her cheekbones.

"I… love you." She announced simply, shrugging with that goofy gap tooth grin still on her face. Her brown eyes searched his face for a reaction, which came with the growing wide of Nick's eyes.

"You… you're kidding me… Sara!" Nick's jaw dropped as he captured her in their twentysomethingth embrace of the afternoon. "I've had a thing for Sara Sidle since she stunk up the lab with me while we worked on the old decomp in the gym bag…" He laughed, reminiscing times past. "I love you too, Sara. Jesus, am I one hell of a lucky guy or what? I'm alive, and Sara Sidle just told me she loves me." Sara chuckled and poked him, a little embarrassed at his words and the mention of that horrible decomp. She pulled her arms from around him and the light look on her face hardened into a mock serious expression.

"Sara Sidle, you smell like death." She mimicked what he had so proudly told her even after she'd washed with those stupid lemons from Grissom. Nick threw his head back in laughter. "You still smelled great despite that wicked death stench. Oh yeah… and I meant to tell you today too… I love your aftershave. Very attractive." Sara laughed now, flashing her signature grin. Nick, any look of fragility now gone, smiled back softly and drew his head near. His fingers held up Sara's chin gently as her eyes slowly fluttered closed.

"Thanks… I love your death stench." He murmured into her lips as they met. He could feel her lips crack into a small smile as she thwacked him on the shoulder. Nick smiled back into her lips, finally meeting them with a gentle kiss.

"I'm so glad I lived to hear you say that you felt that way… I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner myself. Thank you Sara." Nick whispered into her ear, holding her close as if he was terrified of loosing her. Sara hugged him in return, wiping the tears that were beginning to fall from his eyes.

"Shh… it's okay… I'm not going anywhere." Sara rubbed his back, whispering. Her hand found its way beneath the thin white hospital smock that he wore and her finders drew circles around his shoulder blades. Glad to find that there were no swelling bumps from those horrible ants along his back, she tangled her legs around him in a cross legged position. Nick nuzzled his forehead into her shoulder as he spoke softly.

"I love you. "

Fin.

* * *

Let me know what you think! I'm already considering a sequel- taking place after Nicky goes to visit that #&$! Daughter of his kidnapper at the prison ... She made me ever so angry... (silently fuming) Thanks for reading, please R&R! 

Sahariah


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